17 Things I Wish I’d known before Moving to a New Country

It’s been just over three years since we packed up our lives in South Africa and moved to Portugal. 

In November 2020, during the height of the pandemic, we made a ridiculously quick, life-altering decision that came together faster than we could have imagined. 

Geoff had lost all his Marine Engineering offshore work in Africa due to Covid and inability to travel.    He’d found out there was plenty of work he’d be able to do in Europe. 

He suggested the UK.  

I said, “I’d rather put a gun to my head than live in the UK.”

I proposed Spain or Portugal because of the weather, nature, lifestyle, and cost of living – especially since I already spoke Spanish.

We decided that getting a second passport for Geoff and Luke was also an objective.  When we did the research, we found that Portugal has a 5-year path to Citizenship and Spain 11 years.   So that was the clincher.

We decided in early December 2020, and by June 2021 we’d sold everything, packed up, and landed in Portugal with our 15-month-old son.

It was fast. I didn’t have time to think about it.

It felt really effortless and easy to get into Portugal despite Covid, so we followed the energy, flow and ease – a principle I live by and teach.

Because I love to live an eternal summer, I also held the intention of spending a few summer months in South Africa each year. 

Many of my friends were surprised by our decision, particularly the speed with which we did it.   Because of the speed, I had no time to think about or plan things properly.  (Which was both a benefit and a disadvantage.)
 
As I reflect on these past 3.3 years, I can’t help but wish I could send my current self back in time to share these 17 insights:
 
1. Living isn’t Travelling

“I’m a Great Traveller.  It will be a super adventure,” I naively thought before I left South Africa.

Living in a Different Country (or city) is entirely different from going on holiday or travelling somewhere new.

The demands of setting up a life, the admin around it, meeting new people, and making new friends require deep energy reserves.  
 

2. Everything will take a lot more energy than you realise. (x10 if you do it in a language you don’t understand or speak).  
 
For example: Supermarkets are set up differently in different countries. The aisles are arranged strangely, products are packaged differently, and many brands are foreign.   
 
What used to be a 20-minute grocery shop in your home country will become a 60-minute shop. 
 

3. You will not have energy for EXTRA stuff.  

In your first year (or even two), don’t think about signing up for courses, doing side projects or even scheduling holidays.

Don’t add MORE to your plate.  Rather take things off your plate.
 

4. Take things from home that’ll comfort you.  
 
We brought very little over. We sold most of it in South Africa.  Geoff and I are not attached to “stuff”, so we thought it wouldn’t be an issue.   

I don’t wish we’d brought furniture, but I do wish I’d brought my bed linen.   
I’m so pleased I brought all my pictures, they are unexpectedly soothing. 
 

5. Have someone help you navigate the setup and bureaucracy.

If you need to pay them, do it. It is worth every cent.  
 

6. Make it a Priority to create connections, friendships and community.   

Sign up for a weekly activity where you’ll meet other people, see them regularly and have a rhythm of connecting with them.    
 
Go to a weekly Yoga class, Art class, Walking group, Church or Dancing.    Physical contact with people is vital.  Virtual doesn’t cut it. 
 

7.  Before you arrive in the new country, connect with people online and make friends with people living in the same area as you.  

The same country doesn’t count. The same town or suburb is ideal.   
 This groundwork will make your arrival feel so much warmer.
 

8.  Before you leave your home country – write down a list of the support structures you currently have (that you may not even realise you have).  

Note down everyone who supports you and their roles, from emotional allies to practical helpers.
 
Order that list in priority, from “MOST supportive” and “Must Have” to least.     
 
When you arrive in your new city or country, set up your top 5 support structures within the first 3 months.
 
For example, in South Africa, I went to my energy healer every 2 weeks for a 90-minute massage and woo-woo energy healing session.   I didn’t realise how invaluable the support was until I found someone similar here 3 months ago.

  
9.  When you meet people – ask for recommendations of a Dentist, Doctor, Hairdresser.   

Finding each of these will be more of a celebration than you can fathom right now.  
 

10.  Within the first month – Write a list of all the things you can do in your new city, town or place that give you joy and fill you up.   

Do them regularly and Keep adding to that list as you discover more. 
  

11.  The Germs and Viruses in a new country are DIFFERENT to the ones your body has developed immunity to over a lifetime.   

In the first few years, you may be sick often. And the symptoms may be more severe than you’re accustomed to. 
 

12.  Find out how the Health System works before you’re ill and feeling terrible and then need to navigate it while feeling grotty.   Have a new friend in your new city who you can call on to help you when you are ill.
 

13.  If you have children, set up childcare/ babysitting for the first 3 to 12 months when you arrive.

Emotional ups and downs are normal during such a big transition, so having extra support, even just for a few hours, is invaluable.
 

14.  Actively “DATE” new people you meet to see if you can be friends.  Invite them for coffee.  If you like them, set up a regular weekly experience you can do together to build your friendship. 
 

15.  Be really kind and gentle with yourself.  Some days will be joyous, and others will be challenging.   You’ll possibly be way more emotional than usual.  
 
The challenging days do not mean you have made the wrong decision. They tell you you’re being stretched way beyond your comfort zone. 
 

16.  There will be many, many curveballs.   Instead of getting dismayed, throw your hands up and say, “How Fascinating!”   

Laughing at the bumps will make the ride smoother.
 

17.  Prioritise your health – get enough sleep, exercise and eat well.  

You’ll need every ounce of your energy and nervous system stability.   Thus, the more you can replenish and nourish yourself, the easier it will be.
 
 
Moving to Portugal has been a journey of profound growth and self-discovery beyond my comfort zone. (On challenging days, a part of me deeply longs for that old comfort zone.)

The overarching theme has been, “Who am I, and what am I capable of when faced with the unfamiliar?” 

I’ve been teaching my students for almost 2 decades:

“You can manifest the life you envision. You have the power to create your own magic, wherever you are.”

This experience has been a self-created test to keep applying the tools I teach my students…

… ease, wellbeing, flow, vision, magic, working with money, manifesting, alignment, abundance…

… to turn all the challenges from roadblocks into stepping-stones to a more vibrant, authentic and abundant version of myself.

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