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Bucketing Friend

When you’re feeling down, negative and stressed out, have you ever tried to shift your thinking and tried to Think Positively?

And then you can’t! 
And you feel even more like a failure and get even more “negged-out”.

Been there.
Done that.

So I want to introduce you to one of my most powerful tools for shifting negative emotions; it’s called:

The Bucket.

For this technique, you need:

  1. Your negative thoughts, irritations and frustrations and
  2. A “Bucketing friend” to help you.


    Bucketing is a fantastic technique for “vomiting up” all the negative emotions that may be circling your mind and your body to move them out of you.

    Once you’ve expressed them, you’ll feel an amazing sense of relief and lightness.

    Often, once the emotions are out, the situation doesn’t even need to be fixed.

    Here’s how it works:

    Call your Bucketing friend and say “I need to Bucket”.

    During the bucketing process, one person (your friend) imagines “holding a bucket”.

    The other person (YOU) gets to “puke into the bucket” all of your concerns, frustrations, irritations, upsets, negativity etc.

    Your friend who is holding the bucket doesn’t commiserate or try to solve problems or fix anything they simply hold the bucket (or imagine holding the bucket) so that you can “vomit out” your negative thoughts and feelings

    There usually is frustration, upset, tears, snot, and maybe even anger or sadness. ALL of that is allowed and welcomed in this bucketing process.

    When you choose your Bucketing Friend, you need to explain the process. Make it clear to your Bucketing Friend that they are not to “take it on”, “try to fix it”, “commiserate with you” or “agree with you”.

    All they need to do is IMAGINE holding the bucket, while you vomit into it.

    They must only say – “mmmm hmmmm” and “aaahhhh” and “yep I get it” etc. That’s it.

    No advice. No words from them. No fixing.

    Your Bucketing Friend is someone to listen as you vomit the negative thoughts, feelings and energy out.

    This process is ALL about you being able to Let Go and Release. Your Bucketing Friend is the “observer” who holds space for you in kindness, gentleness and compassion.

    And once you finish your Bucketing Friend needs to ask you:
    “Is there anything else?”

    And you’ll probably say “Yes, actually!” (Because you know when you vomit there is usually a second or even third or fourth heave.

    And once you are absolutely finished… (Some of my bucketing processes have gone on for almost an hour!) …your friend says: “Are you done? Can we throw the bucket away?”

    Then you both imagine throwing the bucket away.
    (For added effect, your Bucketing Friend can also physically mime throwing the bucket away.)

    The beautiful thing about the Bucketing Process is that it allows the space to get it all out without judgment and not trying to find solutions.

    It is a HUGE let-go and release.

    Often with negative emotion, 95% of what is needed is the Let Go and Release so that you can open up a blank space for the NEW possibilities and opportunities. The solution can then arise effortlessly.

    The bucket process is cathartic and should be done regularly.

    It’ll make you feel WAY better.

    When deciding on a bucketing friend, I advise you not to choose your partner, spouse or family member.

    They’re often too close to you and may want to jump in and try to “fix” things for you because they love you.

    If you don’t have a bucketing friend yet:

    1. Choose a friend.
    2. Hit forward on this email and send it to them saying “Please will you be my Bucketing friend”.

    That way, they’ll read this email, know what it is all about, and be ready to help when needed.

    Once you’ve used the Bucketing Technique, email me to let me know how it goes.  I always love getting your feedback.



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